Have you heard the sound of your amazing goals being crushed
into powder by the obese feet of destiny? It sounds a zillion times worse than
the fart my elderly neighbour Mr. Kukreja
involuntarily passes as I drop him to the local supermarket in my Car with the
windows up and AC on. It smells worse too.
Judicial service wasn’t meant to be and I know so because I
lost it with a margin of 8 marks from the cut off. Having taken a year drop
after my law graduation to exclusively prepare for this marathon exam and
having being doubted about my choice by every member of my family tree, it
quite sucks when you prove them right. But Bollocks! I did try.
But life is a funny thing and she gives you a sign in the
weirdest of time. On the judgment day, I was moving in circles around the
laptop awaiting the result that could possibly save my dignity. After all the
basic purpose of our sad little life is to please the society. Just then the
results came out and with the pain in my heart and Sahara desert in my throat I
found out that the Indian courts weren’t lucky enough to have me as a judge. It
hurt. It even hurt to realize that I rejected the job I was recently offered in
Chennai. I rejected 4 decent job offers for this one thing. It hurt.
Just then the door bell rang. I stared at the laptop, rubbed
my eyes, searched for my big glasses, wore them and then walked towards the
front door. It was my farty neighbour’s little grandson with a huge white sack
that he could barely carry. Still recovering from my comitragic defeat I just
sat on the ground and looked at him. The little ugly boy just grinned and
pushed the sack towards me as he said “Garden
se Tode Hain Nana Ne. Aap le lo”
Lemons. Around 50 of them.
And then I laughed looking at the lemons as if I was a witch
who just found the missing ingredient to her potion of immortality. I laughed
till the kid left me standing alone before the open door as he ran away and
never looked back. I laughed till my eyes couldn’t see clearly. Life had given me lemons and I was not going
to weep over it. But what do you do when life gives you 50 lemons. You make
“Nimbu ka Acchar”. Yes! And have it with some Mooli Ke Parathe.
It is quite Ok when the thing that you have been working
towards for the longest time, doesn’t work in your favour. It is alright when
your extended family which was waiting for your defeat has finally got it. It
is even fine when you do not know where your life is headed to. But you have got
to move. That is all you need to!
So you ask me, what’s next? Well, this blog post is typed
while sitting in the High Court of Kerala. Yes!!! I joined an amazing Law firm here and I am a
litigating advocate now. So what if I did not become a judge, I can always
stand on the other side and make their life miserable. You see life is good,
provided you use the Lemons in your favour.
Your Honour, My Ass!!
P.S- An update after a whole month. Well, atleast you know what kept me busy. No internet connection so currently using the Law firm's free wifi. Pray I don't get fired. Amen!
I really don't know how to reply to this.
ReplyDeleteUmm, Congratulations on the new job.
I am sorry about the other opportunities that you missed. I hope you get the best of 'em all, even better. If not now, may be in a little while from now.
And life's job is give the lemons, in the least expected places and time.
I guess you turned it around to you favor. That's actually cool.
Anyways, Take Care. Keep writing. :)
(Now that you have free wifi and access to these sites)
(And yeah, I will pray that you don't get fired. :D )
hahah thank you for being the first to read. and yes do pray i dnt get fired.
DeleteGoods and bads are part of life. Never mind...
ReplyDeleteI don't know much about the judiciary examination system, hope you can attempt again...
congrats for the new job and free ka wifi :)
and, don't worry you'll not get fired.
Thank you so much!!!! and hah ya do pray :)
DeleteSuch are life's adventures. :)
ReplyDeleteWow..a litigating lawyer! That's awesome. Congrats Red!!!
P.S: Wherever there is free WiFi, there is happiness. Period.
HAPPINESS LIES IN FREE WiFi INDEED!!!
DeleteThanks for reading love!
DEAR SISTER..
ReplyDeletePlease hug me!!!
we are the soul-mater advocate sisters regardless of the fact that you are there and I am here..i.e. (Pakistan & India) aint this fact alone not enough to prove our bond that we both were given The Lemons the same way?! Guess what..its their loss...the courts of Pakistan & India...My result was 2 months back, I have recovered and trust me so will you and then practice is more fun so dont lose hope and keep on using the free wifi that is bestowed upon you fail honay ki khushi main like I do;p cheers *hugs*
hehhaahaha...Well coincidence much??!!!!! Well chalo I have someone who knows what I went through. LOTS OF LOVE SISTER!!!
Deletewhere is my comment?
ReplyDeleteThis comment is here.. I wonder about the other :(
DeleteAwww,..sweetie..Dont give up..seriously its their loss for not having you in..
ReplyDeleteGlad that you take this defeat in a positive way..
All the best honey..You are the best..:)
Thanks love. Feels good to have people cheer u up :)
DeleteI kept feeling bad for you until you mentioned Kerela High Court and that you took up a job in a Law firm now! Damn you! You pictured yourself as a 'bechari' as this while! LOL! You are an amazing writer dear :)
ReplyDeleteCongratulations and have a great time making the lives of judges miserable from the other end! :D
"Your Honour, My Ass!!" Khi khi khi khi khi XD
heheh thank you sooo much Manju!!! and yes I have taken it upon me to makes their lives miserable!!
DeleteYou inspire me, milady :D
ReplyDeleteAnd congratulations, on that free wifi! Besides, what's with sitting in the chair and judging people according to rulebooks that haven't been written by you? Sit on the other side and judge people for their worth of salt and be happy :)
Cheers,
Blasphemous Aesthete
I HEAR YOU!!! But if I say the same, then it would sound live the 'GRAPES TASTE SOUR' syndrom. :)
DeleteThanks boss!
Hey good things take great time. If its your dream then don't give up just yet. My friend gave up his job and all the "fun" for 4 years for UPSC. He persisted and now is an IPS officer. You already did the bravest thing by working on it irrespective of the resistance from your family.
ReplyDeleteJobs will always be there, pick up if thats what you want. All the good luck!
Thank you and yes i would try for it again. but I wont now leave everything and sit exclusively for it.
Deletelol, i am still wondering if i should be sad that u couldn't clear your exam or should actually be happy 'coz u have joined law firm in Kerela... wink, wink ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd as little sad as i was for life serving you with 50+ lemons i am thrilled about the free wifi though..;)
Gud luck..:)
Now I am eating the lemon pickle with great joy. So you can be happy for u
Deletethanks for reading babe.!
It is sad indeed to see you fail in the exam. But from the looks of it, you seem to be having a good time at your firm.
ReplyDeleteIf at all possible, after a couple of days or weeks, try to think what went wrong and then never repeat in in your life. In the early stages of my life I think I did not have much faith in myself and because of that I lacked. Lacked in many things. Maybe there is a pattern for you too that you have to find and remove.
We are really happy people in a way. Getting the chance to quit our jobs and prepare for things. Remember that people are living in very very bad conditions too.... barely living some would say. So it is our job to stay happy.
This was my first attempt and I am not sure abt the pattern but it sucked.
Deleteand you are so right, we have the opportunity to leave things. Not everyone has tht!
I think I just might love you a lil
ReplyDeleteI think I just might love you a little now.
ReplyDeletehahahahah I am lucky!
DeleteLet your prayer be as per your wish during this festive season and New Year ahead… :P
ReplyDeleteJust passing by
thank you do pass by again :P
DeleteWho said lemons are bad.In the olden days the poor poets used to meet the king with only one lemon as a gift or offering but made up with words in eulogizing the kings and went away with bags of gold..Your miss in judicial selection is a blessing in disguise.A lawyer,a successful one, at that can make more money than many judges put together and have a social life that the judges are deprived of.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your humourous post.
yes yes...Now that is what I shall strive for. Your comment was the best ever. gave me hope!
DeleteHello there vakeel saahiba :D
ReplyDeleteYou my love are awesome. Glad to suck to mooli ke parathe. I straight would have gone for the salt and tequila! :)
Proud of you! The honor can go kiss its own ass :P
hahahaah salt and tequils would do too. But 50 lemons would call for a lot of tequila and a dead me :P
DeleteHhahaha I love you Leo!
Congratulations on your new job!! Looks like there's some awesome stuff headed your way!!
ReplyDeleteMay what you said come true. Thanks a ton love!
DeleteOur life is a continuum of every single moment of our existence. Good, bad, success, failure, boring , interesting, normal, extraordinary. Each and every single moment has led to this point and everything else from here is going to lead to the future. Whatever it may be. May be it was all for good. May be it will all be for good. Lemons or melons. Until life keeps throwing stuff at us we shall keep catching them and turn them into something better.
ReplyDeleteCheers. :-)
Oh I am a great catcher!!!!! and life is utilizing me for it. Thanks Kanthuuuu!!!
DeleteHi Red,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to know that you missed it by 8. I can imagine how painful that is.
The thing you said about all the members of your family tree waiting for your failure... that is every freaking day of my life for sometime (I won't tell you how long because it is too scary to spell out that number). This relationship with them is so complicated. I absolutely do not care about them and yet not being a failure in front of them somehow matters to me.
I am glad you had the good sense to look at the lemons and the strength to make that lemonade. In the same breath I would like to point out something which you might already be aware of. That being, if deep down you still want to be a Judge you should persist at it against all odds. But of course, I know nothing about the legal world.
I will give it a try again. I can try till I turn 35 yrs old. so its cool with me. and babe relatives are what you get when you think about friends turned foes. They are like tht.
DeleteHi Red,
ReplyDeleteAm so sorry that missed it so narrowly. In my grades of pain... missing it narrowly is definitely more painful than just not making it at all.
But, I am glad you had the good sense to look at the lemons and the strength to make that lemonade.
Like you.. I too wonder why not being a failure in front of my extended family matters to me more than anything else about my family tree. Every member of my family tree is also waiting patiently to see me give it all up and live a below mediocre life and I don't even know why such a useless thought happily occupies my brain when it has better things to think about.
I know that if being a Judge is important to you.. you will make it happen. You are solid.
Yay I am solid!! I love you!
DeleteWhen life's a bitch, I split my crafted-to-perfection-body between two Volvos and do the lungi dance....
ReplyDeleteworks every time. :)
I can stretch much :( I am so vain!! But LUNGI DANCE!! I shall join you for that macha!!
Deleteyou know what, you kinda sorta give me hope. Also, you couldn't have made that up, and if you did... its freaking awesome!!!
ReplyDeleteI remember the first time I failed, I was devastated... ab bus sutta jala leta hoon
I wish i made it up. I wish life hadnt given me lemons. But then again it did. Thank you boss!!!!!!!!
Deletend hum sutta nahi lete...hum icecream lete hain!
You are one of the feisty people I know Red! You sure will get the best out of being a litigating advocate and will go to greater heights.
ReplyDeleteHappy that you are back to blogging with free wi-fi. And don't worry, they know better than to fire you :)
Thank you for having that though about me. Feels so good you knw.
DeleteCant wait for your marriage pictures :P
I read this post and forgot to comment. :( I came back realising my folly. So, you are a lawyer now? Yayy! Time to celebrate Red..you are going to have the freedom to argue without anyone even minding it. It helps, you know. :p
ReplyDeleteIt definitely does. also would now help me postpone my arranged marriage :P
Deleteyou go girl !!! so what if you didnt get that judge post. life has something super awesome stored for you. as for the lemons !! womaygawd only. enjoy this phase molay. be a hard ass advocate and screw that extended family :D
ReplyDeleteCheers and merry christmas !!!!!
This was your shortest comment ever and for once I dint even realize it was you :P
DeleteHappy new year babe!
thanks for sharing in a very nice writing.
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading
DeleteI SO wish I make my Nimbu ka achaar just like you :/
ReplyDeleteCongratulations and good luck on the new profession and making their lives miserable :)
Try it and you shall!!!!!!!
DeleteHave a great year ahead!
You're funny and how! :)
ReplyDeleteIf you get fired try stand up comedy - we need wacky and brilliant ones like you in this country, I'm telling you!
Chalo now you just gave me a career option. AWESOME!!
DeleteOuch, that hurts but guess you laughed at your destiny and carved a new one for yourself. Congrats on the job. :)
ReplyDeletetHANK YOU saru!
Delete:) how many ever doors close, somewhere sometime one does open right :) Have fun in Gods Own Country Red :)
ReplyDeleteSO SO TRUE!! God isnt heartless afterall.
DeleteBest of luck for the new job! Maybe better things await you:)
ReplyDeleteHope so too!
DeleteAll the very best dear red handed. ! I know u will rock. Fire karke to dekhe. The bloggers brigade will shoot 'em
ReplyDeleteLove
Afshan
oooooh my personal army now~~ !! Yay I love u guys!
DeleteI just feel so sad when I see those lemons ..... a sheer waste of vitamin C.
ReplyDeletehahahah indeed!
Deleteahh congratulations :D such an uplifting post :D you really know how to make use of lemons :D
ReplyDeletelearntt it the hard way :P
DeleteNow THAT was one great way of handling a disappointment. Congrats and best wishes in your new job.
ReplyDeleteA parting thought - "When the gods are angry, they give you what you wish for" :) Looks like the gods are not angry with you :)
I think it is time I made them angry and had it all my way!!!!!
DeleteNice attitude towards life. We have no option but to take things in our stride. Life is always filled with the unexpected.
ReplyDeletetrue true!! Thanks or reading!!
DeleteAccha Kerala High Court. The lawyers are must having a wonderful time now :) Never expected U would be a lawyer, how can any lawyer be so funny?
ReplyDeleteSuch a humbling compliment. means a lot. thank you!
DeleteYou'll be a great lawyer. :D
ReplyDeleteAnd I love your attitude, Take care. :)
And I love you! Have a great new year!
DeleteThey say - "Try, try till you succeed".. But the same people also say - "When the roads not worth it, change it!".. Its upto you to make the decision.. :) All the best, Red!
ReplyDeleteBEST ADVICE EVER!!!
DeleteHow did I miss this post of yours? Anyway I think that you'll make an awesome advocate :) Don't forget to flick your hair, swish your Kala coat and say "I Object your honor". Happy New Year Red :)
ReplyDeleteHappy New year love!!!! and thank u for being an absolute sweetheart.
DeleteYou won't get fired.
ReplyDeleteThe Government of Kerala has too many hartals on it's plate anyway.
And Kerala judiciary huh?!
My my.You'll have fun!
Hhahaha I sure hope so!!
DeleteThank you so much. And yes it takes guts but also understanding the fact that if you dnt the next step, u might reach a dead end. :)
ReplyDeleteHappy New Year.
How intelligently you have used lemons in this part witty, part satirical, part real and fully interesting post.
ReplyDeleteCongrats. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. My best wishes are with you.
:)
Thank you so much!!
DeleteSince I am late to the part, congratulations..and life gives you good and bad and all that..
ReplyDeleteBut more importantly, I LOVE your writing style! Lawyer? You should be freaking writer! What ease with which you mingled those lemons into your story..Been a while since I read someone and though, how I wish this person wrote a book. :)
All the best with your job, but I hope you don't get too busy and stop blogging. Can't believe I didn't come across your blog earlier! :)
Oh and happy new year!
Your comment left a huuuuuuuuge grin on my face :) and Thank God i came across you :)
DeleteCongrats on the new job ! I'm glad its working out for you ! Life's handed me a lot of lemons too late, aahhh the pain of unrequited love ! what do you do when one day you're planning on getting married looking at a perfect fairytale ending, and the next day the object of your affection decides to bail, without even giving you a clue as to what went wrong ! ..........aahhh the pain :(
ReplyDeleteDAMN!!!! Well, I am sure things will turn out well eventually. Hold on!
DeleteReading the 4th post of yours and hereby I declare..I am in love with you! Phew
ReplyDeleteI love u tooooooooo!
DeleteWow ... an advocate blogger ... it would be fun reading you now ;-)
ReplyDeletehaha Thank u!
DeleteIt is alright when your extended family which was waiting for your defeat has finally got it. It - Terrific Truth of Life
ReplyDeleteNothing happens for bad ...I trust on it blindly...everthing shall only lead towards good
It has been an year following you, but I never commented. I couldn't resist this time. Kudos to you and your optimism!!
ReplyDelete