Wednesday 24 August 2011

The Funny Professor

We have this Professor who is a bit loose. By 'Loose' I mean a bit ‘mentally kicked’. A strong disciple of Mahatma Gandhi, he refuses to talk about anything else other than the topic Gandhi and his Dandi March. Apart from this known topic, he also discusses about his wife, his daughter who according to him chats with random guys online and other such important stuffs. Now I tell you why I think he is a bit loose.

I am not a cheater cock or hen, whatever you call it to be. Back in school, I was the nerdy type who never peeped into her neighbour’s notebook nor did I let them peep. Yeh! I was cranky like that. Then college began and it spoiled me, but you can’t ever find me complaining. In the second year, a classmate from Bihar found this new method of cheating during internals. Our internal answer sheets were just plain sheets of paper which you get in the college office room. So, this guy would go to the office room and take some papers on the pretext of writing notes, application letters etc. Our ‘loose’ professor had the habit of accidentally telling the question in advance. So, this guy would take those plain papers home and would write down the perfect answer and the next day he would just slip in that paper as the answer sheet. Do note that it is only an internal exam where there is no proper seating arrangement and this dude has been pretending to write the exam while sandwiching the already written answer between his buttocks and the chair. His mission was accomplished and he scored shooting stars!!

So we the rest of the crowd, became what you call the followers. I had already been hypnotized by the college wind and decided to do what makes me look cool and less nerdy. In the second internal, I too wrote the answer a day before and at the time of exam, kept it under the real sheet on which the answer was actually meant to be written. I never knew that the wind God was conspiring against me that day. The wind blew hard and for 3 seconds exposed the already written sheet, which was hidden under the paper I was pretending to write on. Next thing I know is the Professor taking the sheet, looking at me in disbelief and asking me to get out of the class. Because of me getting caught, the rest 57 students couldn’t copy for that one internal.

As soon as the exam was over, I went to him personally and apologized. The conversation went something like this.

Me- Sir, Sorry! I will not repeat it!
Saar- Forget that! Nice Handwriting you have. Who do you look like?
Me- Sir, I used to look like my Father when I was a child but now they say I resemble my mother.
Saar- You know my wife says my daughter is as Handsome as me.
Me- Oh nice! Sir, about my internal answer sheet, please do allow me to write it again.
Saar- No need, this one will do.
Me- You mean to say that I do not have to write again?
Saar- No no! So last year I had CHIKUNGUNYA and I had to take leave from a month because I could not wear pants. You see, I cannot come to college without pants. I wish they allowed Lungi.

The result was declared the following week. I got an ‘A’ for that controversial paper. So you know why I call him a bit loose. Or maybe I am just lucky! Whatever the reason is, he is a very innocent man with a very pure soul. 

Image Courtesy-
                          The image has been edited to include the actual line by the Professor.


  1. :D If only all profs were as as loose as this one!

  2. Jesus Christ!! What a prof!! :D :D
    So you y'all still copy that way??
    God bless the prof's wife and daughter.. had he not been that involved, he wud have not spared you the crime!! :D

    Awesome read!! :)

  3. I liked the "CHIKUNGUNYA" part.Between I used to be like you.Shit scared that someone would actually catch me in the act of copying or helping in copying.So the intelligent me wrote my internals in ruled paper so that no one would bother to ask me to pass my answer paper to them.

  4. Lucky u . I wonder wats the relation between his daughter, u copying and Chickungunya. U ended up with A :)

  5. Your Saar is God but his unreasonable thoughts will certainly lead him to some hard bashing.

  6. Hilarious is an understatement esp the conversation between you and your professor.

  7. @spaceman Spiff- my first reader!! Thanku!
    @metagravity- No his subject was insecond yr. Now he doesnt teach us. Snuff we dnt cheat
    @Blue Lotus-In school when anyone asked me stuffs or asked me to pass the paper, i acted as if i cudnt hear and continue to luk
    @Partha- even i cannot till now figure our the
    @Prateek- haha true!
    @Menachery- heh! Thankyou so much! Yeh he is actually a Pavam but a bit bizzare.

  8. LUCKY YOU !!!

    Internal tests are a joke throughout the country then irrespective of stream.

    The only professors I seem to be running into these days are the 6'4, aggressive looking triple PhD's who will gangrape(Pardon for obscenity) you in viva's even if a nuclear war is going on outside the room.

  9. Whatte professor man! I wish mine were as cool:|

  10. that u have got an 'A' he became "a very innocent man with a very pure soul"..sahi hai :P

    but girl, u r damnnnn luckyyyy i must say...i too wished i had profs like urs in our collge :(


  11. I don't like teachers who encourage cheating. :|

  12. WOW! :P That is totally awesome!!! :D

  13. @aakansha- heh thanks!
    @sam- thankyou!
    @Atrocious Scribblings- hah! Lets not even talk about these Vivas. How i haaate them!
    @Priyanka- Hehe he taught us just for one semester. ;(
    @subtlescribbler- hah! Yeh i agree..i was lucky enuff! Thanks hun!
    @Rachana- Ahem! Well to make u feel good lemme tell u he was thr just for a sem. Thanks girl!

  14. bwahahahaahaha!!! Voila! You are fun...hehe this was such a hilarious post and every college has some nutty professors :D

  15. LOL....wish cloning was perfected..and the clone of this loose professor to be sent to every college.. :)

  16. hahahhahahah. Lucky you.
    They should allow lungis. Hahahahaha

  17. LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hahaha!! Terrible! Lol, lucky you. I wish we were blessed with such lecturers too.

  18. awwwwwwwwwwwww he sounds to be a really innocent guy...and yes lucky you for that paper!:-)

  19. OMG!!What a loose one :P but yes definitely lucky for you ;)

  20. i was tempted to read ur blog based on the guest post u did for Priyanka @confessions of the chocolate obsessed
    and i am glad i did
    u r one hell of a writer gurl!!!!!!!!!!!
    me hooked to u :P

  21. I was caught with a 'chit' once and they took me out and I failed in that exam! :p
    You are *so* lucky! :D

  22. He is so innocent and you're lucky to have him as an evaluator. :) Funny as usual:)

  23. Consider this. Mr. X knew that he was gonna get 8 out of 10 programs taught in the class for his mid-term exams in class 8. Mr. X wrote all 10 lengthy programs on 10 fullscape papers and sneaked them into the exam hall. When he was writing the 5th program out of the 8, his "chit" was caught. The teacher who always referred to Mr. X as "a gifted boy who wasted his talents" threw him out but didn't report the incident. Lucky X !!
    I wish Mr. X had a chance to complete the last 2 lines of the 5th program; he would have passed the exam. Sigh!

  24. Now I knw why I didnt make it to IIT.. this guy was NOT my entrance exam invigilator :(

    U know, I was debarred for a trimester for being caught copying.. I went to see a horror movie that very day... Yes, totally depressing movie.


  25. :D :D I got caught once trying to ask the answer to a particularly nasty question... the usual 'asking for an eraser' excuse did not go down well with the invigilator (our thermodynamics prof) and he threatened me saying he would 'seal me up in a bhakoom (vacuum)chamber if I turned back again.' I guess you need to be a certified nut to teach engineering :P

  26. What the hell? You and ur prof should both be whipped in public!!

    Cheatercocks!! :P


    blog updated :)

  27. GOD bless Him! :D

    Blasphemous Aesthete

  28. "...the large intestine eats the small intestine" !!! Hahaha! Even we had many such loose professors, but sadly, they were never too lenient with cheating.:( Lucky you! :P

    When it comes to cheating i am a big pain in the arse cause i just CAN'T CHEAT nor let anyone. Don't ask me how irritating it gets for me when i see guys sitting beside me during examination hall tend to exchange papers.

    But then this is LIFE! no? :D
    And you professor! Well i wish i had a dumb professor like that. Such people are just too sweet you know. :P
    He actually talked about his pants? LOL!

  30. You are revealing all your secrets.. :P and your college secrets !!! :D

  31. Thankyou all ...i am sorry for not replying individually.

  32. ohoy- haha lolz u were lucky indeed
    mad profs- really my adorable darlings then:-)

  33. heeeheee :D This is hilarious! I wish I had such a professor in my college! ;)

  34. I have loose lecturer too, but he is nowhere close to this one :D

  35. And we had TWO such professors and only one girl in our class (who obviously was always a topper, ONLY IN INTERNAL EXAMS). Another advantage of being a girl:(
    Jokes apart, I did my MCA from Orissa and believe me I learnt the the actual art of cheating there only. We used to tear A4 sheets half from the length and fold them like a paper fan, and write answers on each fold. You could actually hide them between your fingers and copy easily. I dared it once and I had three such cheats with me. The invigilator gave a warning before exam and I threw out two of them. Finally just moments before the exam started, I threw out the last one also. And guess what, all three questions were present in the question paper:(

  36. Hilarious. we had an internal exam where somebody took my answer sheet and I had finished my exam and wanted to leave , but couldn't because I had to wait to get my sheet back. Had to pretend for 30 mins to be busy reviewing answers.. he.. he


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